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I lowered my black cap as I sat on the bench outside the red brick school building. I could feel people in the familiar uniforms burning lasers into me, probably whispering about my dad or something. I clenched my fists in my lap, trying to hold back my anger. Just gotta get through today, just one more measly day and I could be free.
“She’s probably just like him.”
“Bad genes I bet.”
Hold it in Minjung.
“No wonder she has no friends.”
Just… hold… it…
“Yeah. They’ll probably end up dead anyways.”
“MY DAD IS NOT A MURDERER!” I screamed, shooting up from the bench, facing the owners of the voices. My eye was twitching with anger. How dare they, when they don’t even know what kind of person he really was? How dare they, when they don’t know the pain.
“Oh yeah. He’s in jail because he was picking flowers, right?” a stuffy voice snickered. I whipped my head around to face him and his gang of losers.
Sungkyu’s cronies cheered him on while he stared me right in the eyes, grinning like the Joker. I clenched my jaw and looked down towards my battered Converse. “Shut up Sungkyu.” I gritted out between my teeth.
“Or what? You gonna murder us?” he asked laughing with that evil smirk of his.
I growled, not being able to hold it in anymore. Who cares? I’m gone after today anyways. I snapped my eyes to connect them with his. All I could see was red. I was the wolf and he was my prey. My breathing became rapid and sharp as I locked eyes with my target. My brain started calculating in the few seconds I had. If I punched the left side of his chin from a low 45-degree angle, I would be able to give him a good purple bruise and a nice cut on his lip from where is teeth would connect. I flexed my knuckle by my side and tensed my arm. “I SAID SHUT UP!” I screeched right at his face and my clenched fist connected with his jaw, upper cutting him. He stumbled back and stared at me with his eyeballs shaking crazily, and just as predicted, his lip was oozing a brilliant red.
“You crazy bitch!” he shouted at me, holding his jaw. I sneered at him, not giving two shits about damaging his pretty little face. Being surrounded with so many people, he knew he couldn’t do anything about it, or else he would ruin his perfect little rich boy reputation. I simply fixed my cap and turned around, pushing my way through the crowd of cellphones. I knew perfectly well that Principle Shin would see these videos in as little as 10 minutes, but it’s not like she could give me a detention on my last day. I stuffed my hands in the pockets of my black hoodie and walked away from the scene.
Yes, I was that girl. The girl whose father was in jail. The girl who had zero friends. The girl who wore nothing but black. The girl with anger issues, anxiety, and depression. The girl who secretly took self-defence classes so that she could protect herself from the world. The girl who broke the detention record. The girl who didn’t care.
Yes, I was that girl. The girl who wanted to be normal. The girl who longed to be accepted. The girl who wanted to clear her father of his reputation. The girl who would give her life for someone she loved. The girl who loved too much and broke too hard. The girl who didn’t care.
I angrily wiped my burning eyes as I speed-walked away from the building. I just had one more useless class left. I’m just not going to go. It’s not like they’ll miss me anyways; I bet they wouldn’t even notice I was gone.
The cold fall wind hurricane around me, causing my damaged and tangled hair to whip me in the face. I pulled my hood over my hat and sniffed, my only source of warmth coming from the hot tears that were inching their way down my face. I walked the all too familiar road, navigating though alley ways and streets until I stopped in front of the police station. I looked up, the bright blue and yellow dancing in front of my eyes as if it was some sort of damned gathering place or something. We’ll I guess it kinda was, wasn’t it?
I pushed though the icy glass doors and to the front desk. “Can I see my dad please?” I mumbled, not looking up. I heard a sigh.
“Aren’t you supposed to be in class Minjung?”
I looked up through my eyelashes to be faced by Officer Choi. I shrugged. “What’s the use?” I asked as I heard him get up off his chair and leave the front desk.
“Hm, I don’t know, you learn valuable things?” he suggested as he lead me though the station and to the visiting room.
“Valuable things my ass.” I muttered as I sat down in front of the glass.
He shook his head and patted my back sympathetically. “I’ll bring your dad out.” He said and disappeared through a door.
I fumbled with my fingers as I continued to stared down. My black jeans were tattered and torn, the rough fabric littered with stains of both mud and blood. Well, it was still better than the disgusting vomit yellow of our school uniforms. God, I hated that skirt. Made me feel vulnerable. I couldn’t run or fight or anything in that thing.
“Flower, what did I tell you about slouching?”
I snapped my head up to be met with a soft smile. The tears that were swept away with the wind immediately began to form again in the corners of my eyes. “Appa….” I reached up and pressed my hand against the glass. He pressed his hand through the glass against mine, reminding me about how big and reliable they were.
“Appa…. I miss you…” I whimpered as I studied his worn features. Once bursting with life, his face was now sunken in and wrinkles cracked rivers across his sagging skin. Moles replaced freckles, his lips robbed from the rosy pink that once was.
He slowly lowered his hand and smiled as if he was okay. But I knew that smile too well. I had mastered it myself.
“Why aren’t you in school Flower? It’s your last day, isn’t it?” he asked me.
I lightly kicked against the metal divider separating us. “Some kids were talking about you again and I couldn’t take it.”
“Is that why is your knuckle red?” he asked me softly.
I looked at my hand, noticing that it was still throbbing crimson from the impact to Sungkyu’s jaw. I quickly pulled my hand into my sleeve, hating that my father had seen it, knowing that he was disappointed.
“We talked about the fighting, didn’t we?” he asked. I simply looked down at my feet again, something that I was doing often today.
It’s not like I regretted it, the bastard deserved it.
“Did punching that student satisfy you?” my dad asked.
“No,” I grumbled. “but he did shut up.”
“Flower, look at me.” He said. Weakly, my eyes met with his again. “Fighting won’t get you anywhere. I know you feel like everyone is taking advantage of you, but please, stop the fighting. If not for yourself, then do it for your old man, huh?” he said, sincerely looking deep into my eyes. “Be someone I can be proud of, okay? When you move schools, make me proud, okay? That way, I’ll be able to brag about you to my cellmates.” He joked.
“Appa!” I said as I chocked down tears. “They keep calling you a murderer! It’s not right! I know you’re not! Your innocent appa, but they’re too self-absorbed to realize!”
Just then, an officer came in and grabbed my dad’s arm, pulling him off his chair.
I stood up as well, knocking my chair over, and gave him a confident look though my blurred vision. I slammed my hand against the window as the officer pulled my dad away from me. “I’ll find the real culprit appa! I’ll set you free! You don’t deserve to live your life away in this shithole! You’re innocent, and I’ll show the whole world that!” I shouted through the thick glass.
“Minjung-ah!” my dad called before he was pulled through the door and out of my sight.
“Appa!” I shouted one more time before the whole room went silent. I sobbed as I turned around and ran out the room and though the station.
“Minjung-ah!” I heard Officer Choi call me, but I ignored him and shoved the glass doors open and ran past the parking lot and into forest.
My hands quivering, I reached into my pocket and wrapped my pale fingers around my escape. I pulled the compact white roll out along with a box of fire. My hand still shaking, I brought the cigarette towards my lips and bit the end. After failing a few times, I finally managed to click the lighter, bringing the flame alive. I started at it dance in front of my eyes before I lit my cigarette. I took a long drag of the stick of bliss and immediately my body warmed up and my heartbeat slowed. I sighed as I leaded against the trunk of a tree and blew out a long puff of smoke. If I couldn’t experience the embarrass of my father, then at least I had the embarrass of this wonder. I stared up to the sky as I took another drag, vowing to find whoever was responsible for ruining mine and my father’s lives.
No matter what it takes, I will grab that basters by his balls and drag him right down into hell. I swear it.